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| Happy Birthday Chuck (aka Carlos Ray Norris) |
| Cars & Trucks, Etc. : American : Dodge |
| 03/15/06 |
Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word he simply changes the actual spelling of it.
Bullets dodge Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris uses pepper spray as eye drops.
Cars were invented as a faster way to run away from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
There are no disabled people, only those whom Chuck Norris has not met yet.
Chuck Norris never turns on the light-he illuminates the world with his eyes.
When some people try to show their strength they rip phone books in half. To show his strength, Chuck Norris rips those people in half.
Chuck Norris could kill himself and
live.
Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.
It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.
If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.
On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over.
Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.
God offered Chuck Norris the gift to fly, which he swiftly declined for super strength roundhouse ability.
Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.
Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye
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